Recover is a ten-week study to help women recover from sexual betrayal. It starts with the relational component of stories from women who have journeyed with a spouse addicted to pornography or sex outside of the marriage (the video sessions). It’s an interactive experience that provokes deep thought and reflection, allowing women to write their own story and be in control of their outcome (the guidebook). This program altogether (the book, guidebook and ten video session curriculum) leads them to a place of healing and recovery they didn’t know was possible. It will change how they view themselves in the midst of uncertainty and help them to rediscover themselves and all they were meant to be.

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THE PROBLEM

 50% of Christian men admit to viewing porn.

For the majority of that percentage, there is a woman hurt by their addiction.

The vast majority of the faith community, including leaders and laity, believe pornography is a bigger problem in the Church than it was two decades ago. But many do not know what to do about it. Many wives and significant others are often standing alone because no one knows how to deal with this problem, or worse they are given advice that leads to further trauma.

A commonality amongst Christian women dedicated to men who are addicted has been further trauma through the counsel of those who are ill-equipped. In the making of this program, we learned from women some of the astonishing things they were told in both pastoral and Christian counseling:

• “If you were more submissive in the bedroom perhaps that would help this.”
• “Maybe God is more concerned with something He’s after in you then in your husband’s struggles.”
• “If you didn’t have such a critical spirit your husband wouldn’t be searching for affirmation elsewhere.”
• “Maybe dress up a little, fix your hair & make-up and be presentable when he gets home from work.”  

All of these statements are blame statements and tell a woman that she should be able to control her husband’s choices. This type of counsel leads to further trauma and only causes more pain, confusion, and despair.

AND IT IS CLEAR THAT APPROACHES LIKE THIS AREN’T WORKING. IT’S TIME FOR A NEW APPROACH – ONE THAT’S ROOTED IN LOVE, GRACE, AND HELPS A WOMAN REDISCOVER ALL SHE WAS MEANT TO BE. IT’S TIME TO WALK WITH HER ON THE ROAD TO RECOVER.

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WHY EXPERIENCE RECOVER?

• Recover addresses the lie that women are the cause and somehow responsible for their loved one’s addiction. Through each session women are encouraged, built up and reminded of the truth– They are loved, valuable and CHOSEN by an all-consuming God who will never leave or forsake them.
• Recover moves women from a place of hopelessness to a place of assurance and peace that is not dependent upon their spouse’s choices.
• Recover addresses the importance of forgiveness, accountability, and boundaries–not just for their loved one but also for themselves.
• The Recover Guidebook is the catalyst to personal, in-depth reflection through an interactive experience by asking thought provoking questions and challenging exercises allowing women to write their own story.
• The Recovered by Hope book is a compilation of letters written to women suffering from sexual betrayal from women who have been there and experienced the same devastation. There’s nothing better for peace of mind and a broken heart than knowing that someone truly understands.
• Recover is the right approach to help women right now, the right way!

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